Ashley talks about our relationship to the seasons and why we often struggle emotionally in the winter. Tune in to learn about the energies held within each season, why our relationship to the seasons is so important for our happiness and fulfillment, and ways to lean into the deep, reflective potency of the winter.
In this episode
We'd love to hear from you! Send your comments and questions to: ashley@liveatyouredge.com
Ashley talks about our relationship to the seasons and why we often struggle emotionally in the winter. Tune in to learn about the energies held within each season, why our relationship to the seasons is so important for our happiness and fulfillment, and ways to lean into the deep, reflective potency of the winter.
In this episode
We'd love to hear from you! Send your comments and questions to: ashley@liveatyouredge.com
Ep 7 - Shift with the Seasons
[00:00:00] Ashley: Welcome back to Live at Your edge. On this show, we talk about finding your growth edge and finding a version of yourself and your life that feels fulfilling and meaningful to you. This is Ashley, your host. And it's good to be back with you today. It's just me on the show today. I hope you all had a beautiful Thanksgiving. If that's a holiday you celebrate.
[00:00:31] Today on the show, what I want to talk about is the changes that happen in our inner beings and the way we engage with the world that relates to the seasons. The seasons of the year. So this is a topic that's a little bit different than what we've talked about so far on the show, but I think it's really important. And I'm going to explain to you why over the next few minutes.
[00:01:01] So right now, when I'm recording this episode, it is the end of November, beginning of December, 2022. And so we are beginning to transition in from, from fall into the winter. That'll happen in later December right. And at the winter solstice. And my perception is that this transition is the most difficult for most of us. I notice people struggling with the transition from fall to winter. And it's one that I have struggled with throughout the vast majority of my life. And it's really only in the last couple of years that my relationship to the changing of the seasons has been evolving in a different direction.
[00:01:49] So this is a topic that is not something I hear talked about a lot. And I do want to just add the caveat here that, of course this talk of the seasons that I'm going to be engaging in today is mainly applicable if you're living at a latitude where there is more or less four seasons. There will be changes regardless of where you live. But specifically this conversation is about the temperate zone where there's primarily four seasons: spring, summer, fall, and winter.
[00:02:22] So the changes that I'm talking about are related to the kind of energy that comes with each season and the way that energy kind of translates into our own beings and how we experience those seasons. And then what kind of state we're in during each season.
[00:02:42] And so, I think a lot of this stuff is pretty intuitive to all of us. And we all sort of know is happening. And we can all feel that like when the spring comes, there's a sense of renewal, right? You can kind of feel the energy building right. There's like more energy that's coming in to our lives and we start getting energized to do things like do spring cleaning, refresh everything, get a fresh start. And like it's that spring energy, right? All of us I think, are familiar with this.
[00:03:13] And then the summer time has this very bright, vibrant energy where like everything outside is green. The insects are buzzing. There's so much life, right. Life is sort of at its fever pitch during the summer. And there's a lot of energy out there that it's hotter, right. The temperature's hotter. And so there's more. There's just more energy in all these regards. And so summer, at least in my experience, and I think this is true for many people tends to be a really intense time. There's lots of social events. There's just lots of stuff being planned. There's travel. It tends to be sort of a feverish time in a lot of ways, right? There's just so much happening. It's like a very fertile and alive time.
[00:03:58] And then most of us experience that when the fall starts to come and the temperature's cooled down. You can store to feel the energy starting to drop down, right. Things start to get a little bit quieter. There's this dropping of energy.
[00:04:14] And then by the time you get into winter, the energy drops really, really low. And you can see that externally because all the outward signs of life in nature go dormant, right? Not all of them, but in terms of plant life in particular, you see leaves drop off of the deciduous trees. And, they drop into the ground and they decay and a lot of animals go into hibernation. There's just this feeling that everything is going underground, right? And then if you live in a place where there's snow and the snow comes, it kind of buries everything. And so there's this sense of depth that comes.
[00:04:55] So that that's kind of the overview that I want to give to the seasons and the energy that comes with them. And like I said, I don't think any of this is like new information right? I think we all I experience these changes. But I want to kind of shine a light on them and talk about our relationship to these things.
[00:05:15] Because my personal experience is that a lot of times what our interior experience is as we're living our lives and seeking to create these lives that are fulfilled and where we feel good and we're able to evolve and grow in the ways that we are hoping to. And you know, we don't exist in a vacuum. We exist within our environments. And so the context for that is these other pieces of the puzzle, right? The, like, what is the energy of the season? What energy are we embodying right now? And what's going on in our world?
[00:05:54] So for me, this is really important because there is a natural cycle to things in terms of what we're growing into and when is like a good time to be shedding things that are no longer serving us, right? Like old patterns. There are times during the year when it's really natural to sort of shed things that are no longer serving us. And there's times that are really fertile and creative. And then there's times to like be quiet.
[00:06:25] And I think one of the challenges I've personally faced a lot, which I alluded to in the beginning is the transition from fall into winter. Because our culture and our society, at least here in the United States is one that is very much tied to the energy of summer, if that makes sense. We're a culture that's very go, go, go all the time. And schedule the social events and go out and do things and be active and be social and be like, go, go, go. That's the energy that is idealized in our culture.
[00:07:08] And that is really, to me, a very summer kind of energy. And so it works in the summer and a lot of people feel really good in the summer. And you know, it's like this alive, vibrant, really active time. But then as the energy starts to drop in the fall and winter, I think a lot of us can feel that happening.
[00:07:28] But because we are so conditioned to be in that go state all the time. I think the transition can feel really, really hard. It's like we're resisting. We're resisting that slowing down and getting really internal, instead of going from our energy kind of going outwards into the world.
[00:07:52] As we descend into the winter time, is a winter is very much a time of being internal, right? Like you can feel that everything kind of goes underground in nature. There's this feeling of dormancy. But like for a human being, my experience is that the winter is a time for this dropping deep into ourselves and reflecting on what's happened during the year. And being deep in that internal experience.
[00:08:22] But I have to say that this shift, I think can be really hard. Even once there's a like intellectual understanding that the winter has this energy, I think it's still hard to actually do it, like to actually get our systems to shift into a different state.
[00:08:44] I often find myself falling into a state of depression in the winter because I have gotten into a place where the doing of tasks and like all that outward pushing energy I was referring to in the summer. It helps distract me from what my deeper experience is and when, when all those distractions fall away, it really sort of forces you to get internal, but I've struggled to really shift my energy into a state that feels good at that time. And that's been changing over the last couple of years.
[00:09:24] But I'm going to put out there that I don't think I'm the only one that struggles with this. And I, you know, part of the reason that I'm saying that is because I know a lot of people struggle with seasonal affective disorder, which just means that your mood is affected by the seasons. And it always makes me laugh a little bit, even though I'm not saying that that that syndrome is a joke. It's not a joke. It's a real thing. So I'm, I'm not laughing at that, but whenever I hear it described, I always have to laugh because I think of course we're all affected by the seasons. Like. Yeah, like. It's uh, that's normal. But, you know, so many of us struggle with sad S A D. And I know that a lot of people who live in Northern latitudes are supposed to make sure they're getting plenty of vitamin D. They sell those vitamin D lamps that you can expose your self to in the mornings to try to get some good, bright light in your eyes. And there's good science behind that, but I just, I personally don't think that's all it's going on with all of us who have this issue. I think a lot of it has to do with our relationship to the energy of the winter.
[00:10:38] And, um, If this is sort of a random aside, but it reminds me of how you all may have heard of the term " hygge" H Y G. G. E. I think I'm pronouncing it correctly. It's the term that's been brought over from Scandinavia. It's gotten really popular in the last few years in particular. It's that term for that coziness, that in those cultures is created during the winter, because of course for them they're good at winter, you know, it's winter like half the year there. So the idea that you get really cozy in the winter and you, you make your, your home, this wonderful cozy place with warm blankets and pillows and candles, and you curl up and drink tea and, you know, your make yourself really comfy and cozy and happy in your home.
[00:11:26] And I think one of the reasons that that concept has become really popular here in the last few years is not only because companies are trying to sell us cozy pillows and stuff, but it's also because a lot of us are struggling I think with winter time. A lot of people migrate to the more southerly locations in the U. S. Right during the winter. Like, we're all trying to get out of this. And it's not bad, right? I'm not judging that at all. There's nothing wrong with doing that.
[00:11:59] But I am saying I think that it's time for all of us to just kind of be working on this, like be aware of this. I think there's a lot of potential for us to feel better for more of our lives, to feel more fulfilled and happy if we can build a relationship with the winter time the feels good. And so I am focusing on winter because A) it's the season that we're heading into right now uh, here in the Northern hemisphere, B) I also don't have the perception that people struggle with spring, summer and fall the same way. I really don't. I think a lot of us kind of know how to do that.
[00:12:41] But I'm just trying to shine a light on this right? I think it's a really fascinating and wonderful practice to start bringing more attention to this. To how you feel at different times of year. You know, this is something that I'm working on myself.
[00:12:57] And just paying attention to like, what are the emotions that come up? And like, is there a certain time of year when I feel my best? You know, for me, for much of my adult life, I always used to tell people that summer was my favorite season. I love the heat. I love the intensity. I loved the energy of it. It was just so vibrant and alive. And I just wanted to be in a summer state all the time, but you know what. And I, again, I think we all know this. It's not actually healthy. We all need time to be our outward facing selves, but also time to come back to ourselves. And be quiet and internal. And restore ourselves, reflect on things like everyone needs that right? It doesn't matter how extroverted or introverted you are. We all need that kind of thing.
[00:13:47] And we have the natural cycle in, in those kinds of things during our daily lives, right. The evening is often a time to come back home and get quiet and reflect on the day. But what I'm saying is that it's not actually healthy to be in a, in a summer kind of energy all the time. The winter's a really beautiful time. I've started to find for myself that I've come to appreciate certain things about winter that I never used to, I used to really have an aversive reaction to the cold weather.
[00:14:22] But I started finding these beautiful things about the winter time that really helped me to lean into the energy of it. For example, the nighttime in the winter. To me, it is magical. If you step outside in the winter. That nighttime winter air has this clarity, this crispness, and this is true during the day too. It's just particularly potent at night. There's this clear, clean feeling. The night time's really quiet in the winter in a way that just isn't the rest of the year, because so much of the wildlife has gone dormant. There's a kind of unique peaceful, quiet the night. In the winter time, it's a really deep, beautiful, reflective time.
[00:15:14] And walking in the woods, I think is absolutely magical in the winter. If you have any ability to do that, if you have an access to a woody area. It's nice because a lot of the plant life's has sort of died back, so the trails are usually more open and you can walk more easily. You can see further into the woods. You can see wildlife more easily. There's this way that it's just such a beautiful time to be outside as long as you bundle up and you've got the right clothes on. Um, it can just be so restorative to go out for walks in the winter.
[00:15:50] I'm just sharing my own personal experience, but what I notice is that not many people do that. And I know that because I spend a lot of time walking outside and of course, so many people want to be out in the beautiful weather. And I mean, I do too right? I completely get it. But I don't see many people out in the winter specifically.
[00:16:10] But my point is if you're someone who struggles with this, are there some things you can find that you just love about the season? And can you lean in to this deep, ah, like reflective, internal energy the winter holds. It's a really beautiful thing. It can be a really beautiful time for journaling. You know, if you have a fireplace, creating a fire in the fireplace. Pulling out a journal. Or just listening to music. Or just doing nothing.
[00:16:46] I think that's the thing that we're so bad at in our culture and it's not a judgment. We just tend not to learn how to do that well. We always want to be doing something. But sometimes. We just need to do nothing. And the winter is the time for that.
[00:17:05] And I think something that can be really hard about this is that our work culture here. A lot of times we're expected to be just as productive in our workplaces in the winter. And when I held jobs that were like that, I used to be miserable to be honest with you. I used to feel like it would kill me to have to try to push myself to produce the same amount that I was producing at other times of year. It felt so unnatural to me. It's not like I couldn't work at all. But I felt like there needed to be a sort of natural ebb and flow that was just expected as part of living through the year. And like, our work culture expects us to just be maximally productive all the time. And it's...
[00:17:55] We all know that that's not really realistic right? And it's not only not realistic. It's not healthy or benefiting anyone except. You know, from a financial perspective, the market of course wants maximum productivity. But like, the market is just, people, we're people and we're creating the market. So like, we somehow need to move past this because it's not benefiting us.
[00:18:18] So. I want to just leave you with this idea. I want to pose the question to you of what your relationship is to these seasons and ask you. What is your life like during these different times of year? What's your internal experience like? Are there times of the year that you tend to not feel happy? Are there times of the year that you tend to struggle? Is there some way to shift your relationship to these things? Is there a way to take on a new energy or state, or just to experiment with different ways of being during those times of year. Is there a way you can take a little bit of pressure off yourself to produce quite as much in the winter.
[00:19:02] So the invitation is just to pay attention and ask yourself. Is there a way I can change my relationship to things? Because I really, I really do believe that even though I think this topic kind of sounds mundane in a way it's like, okay, yeah, the seasons change. Hello.
[00:19:19] But I really think it's important. I think this is an important element to how we live and grow into our best lives right? If we're going to live our best lives, having a healthy relationship to the energy that we're sitting in. I think that is so important. It feels so important to me. And I have found it to be a really important element of my life, frankly. So that's what I wanted to share with you today. I hope there's some thing in here that was interesting to you or helpful to you or thought provoking for you.
[00:19:59] As usual, I want to remind you to subscribe to this show to make sure that you don't miss any episodes and to tell a friend or someone that you know about this show, if you haven't already done so. I'm looking forward to coming back into your feed in a couple of weeks with Lauren. We'll be back in the middle of December with another episode.
[00:20:19] I hope you all are transitioning as smoothly as possible into the winter. And if you're not, then that's okay too right? Just pay attention to that. Thank you so much for joining me on today's show. I always am so grateful to have you here. Thank you so much for tuning in and we'll see you on the next episode.